MyCrazy4 Is The Better Half

My Crazy 4

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

BRAIN POWER

There are those of us who fall on tough times.  Whether we do it to ourselves or it just happens out of the blue.

It's when those bad things happen in life, you find out who you can lean on and who you can trust in the blink of an eye.  You also find out who disappears from your life in the same blink of that eye.  I have come across both in my life since finding out on March 3rd, 2014 that I was diagnosed with Grade 4 Glioblastoma, a fast spreading and aggressive type of Brain Cancer.

This affected my whole family.  And since then I have had friends, family and even people I don't know come to our aid.  Things like phone calls, tweets, facebook messages and cards have flooded in and made me feel so good and even cry.  We have been given food, gift cards, cash, CrossFit shirts, and even visits from friends who came from Ohio and Canada.  All of these were a reminder that people do care about others.

During our first visit to MD Anderson, we learned about a 5K called the Brain Power 5K.  We automatically wanted to do the 5K and found one that was close to us.  The Brain Power 5k 2014 in Cedar Park, Texas  is an event used to help raise money and bring people together in support of Brain Cancer research.  T and I set up a TEAM SCOTT page where anyone can register and join in with us on September 7th in Cedar Park, Tx. or you can easily donate as well to anyone on our team.  After setting up the team page we decided that we wanted to have something special for all of us that were doing the 5K and those who are great enough to support us no matter where they are.

When T, the 4 C's and I moved to Texas at the end of May we were fortunate enough to meet a select group of individuals that we have known and talked to for months and years, but never got the chance to meet in person.  We all share a connection and special bond in more ways than one.  Family, CrossFit and the betterment of life.  One family has gone out of their way to turn something so bad into something so special for us and many more.

That brings in the Brooks Family.  Bobby and his wife Kristy are two awesome people. Bobby who many know as RealDoubleBee in the Social Media World specializes in Online Marketing and Strategy and Kristy is a genius in Graphics Design.

T and I wanted to do t-shirts that would show how we all were part of Team Scott.  Bobby and Kristy came up with some ideas and designs for the shirts.  T and I loved the ideas and then the wheels started spinning.  Graphics were texted and emailed.  Then it was settled.  This is what we decided to run with.

 
Here is what the front of the shirt looks like.
We love the Powered by the 4C's.
 
 
 
On the back we have the hashtag that I started
saying when I found out that I had Brain Cancer.


 
Here is the finished product.
 
If you want a Team Scott shirt 
you can get your own right here
 
 
I need to thank Kong Screenprinting for donating the printing services.  Without them doing that I don't know if this would be possible.  Bobby and Kristy have worked with them in the past and have said nothing but great things about them so I am thrilled and excited to see the shirts and get them on my back and yours.
 
So join me, my family and friends on September 7th in Cedar Park, Tx. and we can walk, run, jog and get to the finish line however you want and help the fight against Brain Cancer.  If I can do a 5k so can you, TRUST ME!

All profits from the sale of these shirts go directly to the BrainPower5k to benefit Brain Cancer Research at MD Anderson where myself and so many others are fighting for their lives.


Special thanks to Bobby and Kristy.  T, the kids and I are so grateful for your hard work.
 
Thanks to Ryan at Kong.  You went above and beyond to help us out.
 
And to T and the 4 C's I want to let them know that I really appreciate all that they have done since March.  Never leaving my side and I love you all for that.
 
 
Kiss The Baby

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Saturday, July 5, 2014

Now A Texas Family

WOW.  That is just one of the words I can use to describe this right now.  I have not blogged since May 3rd.  A lot has happened since then.  SO MUCH.

T, the C's and I packed up our house and the movers came and hauled all of our shit to Texas.  When I say "All of our shit"  we have so much stuff. Just about took up the whole United Movers truck.  A great friend John M. came and drove the other vehicle for us to Texas.

We made it to Texas and what a trip that was but we made it.  We have been here since the beginning of June and we have adjusted well to being here.  The kids are having fun here.  They get to swim every few days and also they can ride their bikes more here because the driveway is longer and the area doesn't have a ton of cars driving like crazy people.  T and I are getting used to the area too.  She is the driver and she already knows how to get to the places we need.  We all go walking around the neighborhood after dinner and the kids rides the bikes too.

This was just a bit of news to try and get back into the blogger frame of mind.

So we are now a Texas family and we will see what happens from here.


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Saturday, May 3, 2014

It's May and do you know what that means?

Well, it has been a long while since I last wrote.  But there is no better day to pick to get back and write something than today

MAY 3rd

May is Brain Cancer Awareness Month and Brain Tumor Awareness Month.  Years and months ago I would have not known this and maybe would have never even given it a thought.  Growing up I knew about other types of Cancer but never Brain Cancer.  Then on March 3, 2014 that all changed.  It all changed for T, the 4 C's and the rest of my family.  I hope it changed for my friends also in the manner that they will now think of Brain Cancer when they hear the word "Cancer".

"Fuck Cancer" is one of my favorite things that I have recently come to love as far as phrases go.  I mean "fuck" is one of my favorite words anyways so it makes sense for me to love that.  Since March 3rd I have had some awesome personal milestones.  On April 23 I completed my six weeks of radiation and I finished all of my sessions with no major or even minor side effects.  A little hair loss on what I called the "laser spots" was all.  And that kind of sucked because I was hoping for total hair loss.  But that is ok, like I say #BetterThanDying.  Then on April 29th I took the last of my Chemo pills and I now have a month off before I have to start taking them again, but this time I only have to take them 5 times a month instead of 7 days a week.  That will be great.

I feel so lucky to be feeling so good.  My body and mind and spirits are feeling so good right now and there are so many reasons for that.  I sometimes find myself thinking "I have fucking Brain Cancer?"  How do I have this and I am not sick, not tired, not grumpy and depressed?  I'm not sure what the hell is going on but all the doc's have told me I have Brain Cancer so I guess I do.

I am going to write some more in the next few days about things I have done to help me feel this good. Things I have taken to make my body feel this good.  I want to help others.  I want May to mean something more than just a month for me now.  I want to be able to use my Brain Cancer as a way to FINALLY make a difference in other peoples lives.  If I can help a child, an adult, the parents of a child or a family member, I want to be that person.

All my life I wanted to be a person that helped others....

In my next post maybe you all can use it as a way to spread my message to others and not just see me for the asshole that I used to be.


Thanks to all of you that read and have read and that continue to check back.  Sorry I was absent for a bit.



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                                          With Brain Cancer◦
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Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Throwing out Thanks and I am starting with them........

Ok. I have written enough sad and sentimental post about this Brain Cancer Bullshit so far.  And while I do appreciate you all following along and reading and sticking with me along my journey, it is time to get back to my regularly scheduled crazy ass writing and throw some thanks around.

I was told many times in the hospital by nurses and doctors that my fitness level and the shape I was in was a primary factor of why I was able to recover so fast and why I was able to get my ass up and out of that damn hospital bed and stand on my own two feet so fast.  They wanted me to pee while laying down.

"FUCK NO"  I am not pee'ing while sitting in a bed.

You can't walk to that toilet they said...."Ummm, kiss my ass! Watch me" as I walked to the toilet and pee'd and I ever made the joke that if you shake it more than twice you are playing with it.  Well, I had a shake party. lol

My fitness.  They knew about my fitness from the CrossFit band I had on my left wrist.  I think I even made a point to ask everyone that came in to look after me if they did CrossFit.  I have done CrossFit for years.  Either at home in my garage or at the wonderful Box of CrossFit Boiler Room in Villa Rica.

I had originally started learning about CrossFit from the Internet and finding blogs and sites to learn from.  The first site I actually started reading and following along besides the CrossFit Main Site was CrossFit Cedar Park in the Austin, Tx. area.  I remember leaving a comment on a post by Nikki Isbell years ago when I started. She and the Master David Tillman helped educate me as well.  After much research online and finding people on twitter, a woman by the name of Paige or on twitter she is know as @GasFamily started throwing me hooks with worms on them to reel me into the wonderful World of CrossFit.  She out of nowhere started offering me suggestions and workouts and ways to learn more about CrossFit and get better at it as well.

Paige never gave up on me through the magical ways of the Internet.

So, as the doc's and nurses and everyone else told me that my CrossFit Fitness Way of Life was a huge part of what saved my life.....I had to do the only thing that I knew how to do and that was talk shit and of course offer thanks to

Paige aka @GasFamily and Nikki Isbell and the CrossFit Cedar Park Family.

Myself, T and the kids owe you all for your love of CrossFit and the ability to spread the love to those of us that are just learning or still learning.

CrossFit Strong.  Cancer isn't killing CrossFit and Cancer is killing me and I am still CrossFit.

There will be more posts of me thanking a lot more of you, trust me.....It's coming.



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Monday, March 17, 2014

Guess What........."You Have Brain Cancer"

I told you all my story and how I recall it all may bounce around and of course it has.

I went from starting with this It's Not Rocket Science

And then next I added this to the story The Beginning Of Brain Cancer - Part 2

I told you about starting my Radiation Treatments Session Number One Of Radiation

Which brings me to today.  Today I will tell how and what I felt as I found out that I was diagnosed with Brain Cancer.

It happened on March 3, 2014.  An appointment at Dr. Ahmad Khaldi's office who happens to be one of the TOP Cerebrovascular and Endovascular Neurosurgeons in the Country. Now I don't know what any of that shit I just typed means but he saved my life so I don't need to know.  He performed the surgery and got the "mass" out of my head.  Not saying "Brain" cause it is still being debated if I had / have a brain.

There is also Brenda Glenn who is Dr. Khaldi's assistant.  She is also the short haired hottie that put my head back together with screws, nuts and bolts and plates and then stapled me shut with about 30-35 staples.

Now as we headed to the appointment all I was really concerned about was getting the staples out.  I was nervous about that because I knew that it would not so much hurt but the nagging factor of getting 30 something staples pulled out was not going to be fun.  Boy was Brenda happy to see me.  She was so happy to see me that she jumped for joy over seeing how good my "fault" line as I call it in my head was healing and she was so proud of her work.  She came in and joked and without even a warning or notice..

SHE STARTED RIPPING STAPLES OUT OF MY MELON.  Ok, that may be a little (A LOT) dramatic but it didn't feel great.  I was even making noises that led her to say "Oh, YOU"RE one of those!" lol. Yes I am one of those, I said.

Then Dr. Khaldi enters the office and sits in the chair all relaxed and such and starts telling T and I about the surgery and how he decided to do what he did.  Why he made the cut in my hairline instead of around my eyebrow and then he started telling us about the mass / tumor he took out of my head.  He explained that the surgery went great and he was pleased with how everything was healing.  He was telling us about how the tumor was not near my eyes and that was a good thing.  I loved that Dr. Khaldi was not trying to "Smart talk" us and was very informative about everything.

"You have Grade 4 Glioblastoma and it is a very fast spreading and aggressive type of Cancer in the Brain." He was showing us scans and pic's of my brain and where the tumor was and how there were other Cancer cells around other parts of my brain.  So after all of the talking and explaining and talking I kind of had NO DAMN IDEA of what the hell he even said. I mean I was listening and trying to comprehend but I just didn't understand it at all.  "OK, I said to him.....Can you please dumb it down for me?  Do I have Brain Cancer?"

YES! He said.  "You have Brain Cancer! And like I said it is an aggressive and fast spreading type of Cancer."  Then he gave me good news.  "It will not leave your brain and spread to other parts of your body."  OHHHH, That is GOOD NEWS?!!!  OK, I am thinking shit...I have fucking Brain Cancer.  I didn't cry when he told me.  I looked at T and our eyes met and then I took a deep sigh.  Then my next question.

"Am I going to die?"

Dr. Khaldi "Its not a matter of if but when."

FUCK!  That is when I started to tear up. (Just like I am now as I write this)

Now I am still trying to not lose it and T is calm as can be and Dr. Khaldi and Brenda are giving me hugs and telling me that I can beat this.  Now this is the funny part.  They told me that I was "YOUNG and HEALTHY".  Ok, I'm 41 and I have fucking Brain Cancer.  Where is the Young and who the fuck thinks Cancer is Healthy?

"Nothing you have done or nothing you could have done could have prevented this" they tell me.  Just a freak thing that happened and the seizure is what set it off and let us find out what was going on in your brain."

They tell me that I have a KP Score of 100. (Info on KP Scores) and that is the best score.  It basically says that I have a great potential for recovery.  Doesn't make me feel better but ok.  They tell me that they think since I am in good shape and physically fit that I will have a good chance at beating this even going through the Chemotherapy and Radiation.  They also then tell me that they are fast tracking me for Chemo and Radiation.

So on March 3, 2014 I was told that I have Brain Cancer.  My life has now been turned upside down and inside out.  I'm 41 with a fucking great awesome wife that loves me and we have four wonderful children.  I don't know what to think or what to do.

Me, the guy that CrossFits daily, eats clean, hasn't drank in 7 years, doesn't smoke and lives right has now been informed that I have Brain Cancer.

Life will never be the same.

But without Dr. Khaldi, I wouldn't have the chance to write this and or even have the chance to try and have a life.  I also asked him if doing Chemo and Radiation will make this better.  I can do six weeks of this and then die in six months? "YES, he said but you may also live many years!"


Dr. Khaldi and Brenda. 
And some dude with Brain Cancer.



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Friday, March 14, 2014

Session Number One of Radiation Treatment.

Thursday March 13th is a day that will be added to the memory banks of my brain.

Wait.  Maybe not. I had Brain Surgery and I have Grade 4 GBM Brain Cancer.  Do I even have a brain?  Will I have a brain when it is all said and done?  Guess we will see.

I had my first session of Radiation Treatment.  Is that what I call it.....a "session"? shit I don't know, but I think I can call it whatever the fuck I want to at this point.

So, they make this mask to fit over my head and lock my into place on the table for the laser beams to zap me and get the Cancer cells to go away. (More on this over the weekend)  My first session was actually ok.  Getting there was not easy.  I started to freak out a bit on the ride over and snapped at T and the kids a couple times.  I was getting nervous and scared and just wanted to go home. FOR REAL....I have been know to quit but I have to fight for them


T and the 4 C's. 

So I get in the Radiation Center and I get ready and then its on.  They explain everything to me and tell me how its going to go and we get rolling.  Again, everyone is so nice.  

I lay on the table and they lock me into place.  Music is playing and we are off to a good start.  The Beach Boys...hell yeah.  Then a song from Heart plays and I am thinking they are trying to kill me instead of help me.  WTF man.....Heart????  Then we get back to the good stuff and another Beach Boys song comes on.  That was close.  I get a little nervous and start to move my hands and the dude says "We are almost done, try to stay still"  (So much for the Adavant working that didn't do shit so far to relax me) and then I thought the World was going to end.  All I asked for when they asked me about music was "NO COUNTRY" and wouldn't you know it.......COUNTRY cam on.  But again I was saved and my session was over midway through the song.

Up and out and it was like less than the 30 minutes.

"That wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible" I told myself.  Got a little locked up but didn't freak out.  Might need to take 2 Adavant for Session 2.  Asked a few questions about the Radiation that I wanted to know and then I was on my way up to get back with T and the kids.  My Radiation will not affect my sex life....Thank god.  I am a freak in the sheets and a man in the streets.  Ahhh hell, I am a freak in the streets too but whatever.  And some rumor about double flushing does not apply to me unless I have a serious funked up session of the toilet variety.

T and I decided that starting on March 13th the first day of my Radiation Sessions that we are going to take daily pic's.  One of me and T.  One of me and the C's and then one of all of us.  Daily reminders of life, love and happiness. 


T, the 4 C's and Lenox.

Damn, we are a good looking family. 


So there ya have it.  Session #1 went better than expected and I am ready for Session #2.

I will be adding more this weekend.


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Wednesday, March 12, 2014

The Beginning of Brain Cancer......Part 2

If you need to be refreshed or need to catch up you can go to this link below and start from the beginning.

Battle of Brain Cancer Part 1


Damn it. Being told my head was cut open and stapled back shut was not fun to hear.  Seeing my wife and parents and buddy John was awesome.

Hearing about a tumor being cut out of my head. Not fun.

Standing up on my own two feet and being able to pee in a cup was awesome.

Finding out my shoulder was popping in and out...sucked ass.  Having a tube and shit drain out of my head....Not cool.  My nurses and doc's that would check on my all the time....ROCKED!!

So...Here are a few pic's from the hospital.  Cry if you want.  But laugh more at how shitty I look.  I was more concerned about my body looking so UNCrossFit like while being in that bed.  Arms shrinking and belly growing and legs losing size....I know my priorities are out of whack but that is me and how I am.  I worked hard to have a .000000005% body like Rich Froning and now it was down to .00000000001%.  So much for me winning the 2014 CrossFit Games. #BetterThanDying


So, I don't think they are making me into a 
Million Dollar CrossFit Man here. Just a guess.


This machine is not comparing my Open Scores to
rest of the field. 


Damn. I don't look any better here than before. 


Well, Hello Kitty. 


My Buddy John who drove from OHIO to make
sure I was ok and to actually keep Tracy from losing her mind.


I don't care if it's blurry, this is me and my 
BETTER WHOLE.
She is that bad ass. Better than a half.


This is a nasty ass cut line. 30+ staples. 
I named myself "ZipperHead"


Post Hospital pic with the C's.
Other than T, my whole reason for living. 


I love the people in this pic more than I love myself.  
They are the only reasons I am even trying to fight and beat this
Brain Cancer.

So, there are some pic's.

I mean I don't even know what else to say.  I was hooked up to all kinds of stuff and then not hooked up.  I didn't like the fact that they had to pull a drain port out of my head, but I didn't like it being in there either so...whatever. 

I heard from people that I curse a lot.  The F word to be exact. FUCK. Yes, that one.  T told me she just now realized that I had legs.  All the years of me CrossFitting and working out she didn't realize that I had muscular legs until I lay in a hospital bed. I found that to be funny. 

I was also delighted to see that all of my body hair had grown back....Not really.  I was not happy with the nasty hamburger that I was fed.  I did love the jello though.  

Most importantly I was pleased to find out how everyone came together to support T while she spent so much time at the hospital.  T and the kids are everything to me.  I live and have lived my life trying to be a great husband and father.  Knowing that T and the kids were being taken care of while I was just sitting in a hospital bed made me feel better.

I will end this part of the story with this, I don't have any idea of all of the people that came to see us.  I know a good majority of you came up while I was knocked out.  To those of you that came up while I was out, thank you so much.  To those of you that I actually saw, thank you.

To those of you that came to show support and love to T, thank you.  To those of  you that also showed support to my mom and dad who flew in from Texas, thank you.

More to come. 

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