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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Wanna have another baby?

"Wanna have another baby?"  That is the question I asked T the other night and then she looked at me like I was crazy and started laughing and asking me if I was serious and still looking at me like I was insane.  "Yeah, I am serious" I mean it would be difficult and all considering a certain male doctor hand his hands all over me and cutting my balls and all, well not actually my balls but the vasectomy deal, close enough.

So T still can't get over the fact that I asked her this and I was sincere. I am an only child and I would have hated for C1 to be an only child. I love the fact that he has brothers and a sister. T has a younger sister and a younger brother.  She has always said she would love to have lots of kids. It would be very tough considering there are alot of hurdles to jump over. All of the hurdles are legitimate one's but they could all be overcome.

1) Vasectomy-either get reversal or just keep trying and see what happens. I personally like the keep trying part, only because that means I am getting some action (wink-wink)
2) Insurance- Neither T or I have insurance (my job is too cheap to offer it to us and I don't make enough to get it)
3) House- Not enough room and since the market sucks, its not like we could move anyways.
4) Money- Money is always an issue, but I have seen alot of people overcome this problem. I have way too often had to go back to my parents to ask for help and they have been great to us, but I am tired of asking for handouts.
5) Time- Is there ever really enough of this. NO. I work 12 f-ing hours a day and drive 1 hour to and from work. T has alot on her plate and where I know she could handle it, I would not feel right putting more on her plate.

There are so many things to consider, and lots of people have lots of kids and they make it and as long as there is love and family togetherness(?) then anything is possible.  Everyday is a struggle to stay emotionaly intact and it has so much to do with my job, time away from home, stress, it all adds up and I battle it every day.  Would another child make it better or worse, don't know the answer to that, but it doesn't mean that I would love my wife and kids any less and I would continue to bust my ass to provide for them the best I could and make sure that T is able to stay home to care for them.

So again with all of this being said....Do I wan't to have another baby.....Yeah. I think having another child and adding to my team would be awesome. Tough and stressing, but awesome. There are probably some people out there that would call us stupid and crazy for having more but I dont care.  My true loving family and friends would be there by our side to help us through.

Now while I am a person that believes in our God, I do have a hard time believing that everything happens for a reason and that he is the reason. I do believe though that T and I decided it was time to get the BIG V (vasectomy)  because we believed that our family was complete. But you know things change. T and I are very, very happy  with our 4 C's and if someting ever happens to add to the C's then we will still be happy. In shock, but happy.

So while I don't think it will happen anytime soon, you know with the clippage, snip-snip and all, it will be fun trying, well not really trying but you know the actual act part. We are not trying per say, but I mean the, you know "Pants off-Dance off", that is the part that will be fun. If it ever happens, I think my first instinct will be to show up at a certain doctors office very pissed off, with a cup full of samples and then I guess I will take it as it comes.

So until that day when T shows me a test that smells like urine and it has a positive mark on it, I will not worry about it.  But just so she knows,  I was serious and sincere in my question to her the other night

"Wanna have another baby?"

Love you lots T.

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