Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Living With An Angry Addict

If you know me personally or have read the blog for a long time and we have become Worldwide Web friends then you know that I usually do nothing but talk so sweet about my awesome wife T.  She has even said before you have to write a post about me being a bitch or something. People like Andrea and Muliebrity have even made statements such as "Puke", "GaG", towards my loving posts that are going to be included in the Bloggers Book of Love someday.

But recently I have discovered that T has a bit of a problem. Now this problem doesn't take her time away from her kids. It doesn't take her time away from the start of the school year. She still coupons, and and cooks and cleans and does all that....But something has a hold of her and its not letting go.

She has become addicted to..
..not painkillers
..not the booze
..not sex....damn it, why cant it be this one!

But the

The kids play the mess out of this game on our phones and C2 got T addicted to the game. Every time I look she is playing this game. She hasn't showered in days and hasn't brushed her teeth and she is sitting in a chair playing. She gets in bed and she plays. She is in the tub and plays. She might play while she is on the toilet, but I wouldn't know about that one.  Hell I even saw her driving with her knees so she could play as she drove down the street.

I cant take it anymore. At night I try to fall asleep and she is in bed playing and all I can here is the sound of this little punk ass monkey from the game.
I wake up in the morning and get ready for the gym and T is sleeping but I see her fingers moving like she is still playing the game in her sleep. I have to get my T back. I wish I knew what to do. The kids have tried to help me. They are asking her 24/7 is they can play with her phone. Gentle whispers of "Mommy can I play Angry Birds?" fill the room, but her grip is tight on the phone. The battery dies, she gets a new one and charges the old. Levels get completed and she has a smile that say "Ha Ha, just beat you little bastards!!"

Maybe if I play along with her and try to limit the time, that will make it easier for her to give up the addiction. If I can just get her to put the Angry Birds away. I am willing to do whatever it takes to try and fix this problem. I love her and will always love T. No Angry Birds game is going to change that or take my wife away.

***Everything in this blog post has been greatly exaggerated and overstated. Except the part about me wanting T to be addicted to sex (with me) and the kids asking to play with our phones all the time.

Kiss The Baby



August 16, 2011 at 11:09 AM   Reply to

Maybe you should dress up like an angry bird and see if it turns her on? That could solve both of your problems, yes?


Anonymous,  August 16, 2011 at 12:20 PM   Reply to

I'm with Tracy. I have the free versions of Angry Birds, Angry Birds seasons and Angry Birds Rio. I also have the paid version of all 3.
Hello my name is Andrea and I'm an Angry Birdaholic.

bev120 August 16, 2011 at 3:08 PM   Reply to

I too am addicted to Angry Birds Rio....Did you they have an AB rehad?

Helene August 17, 2011 at 11:38 AM   Reply to

Oh I totally get it. That damn game is addicting! I'm not sure how I got over it...

Wait, yeah I do. It's called Race Penguin.

I realize basically all I did was trade one addiction for another but still....

Q August 19, 2011 at 7:38 PM   Reply to

I used to be an addict. Wait. Once you're addicted, you're always an addict, right? Anyway, I play "recreationally" now. I'm not a blackout AB player any more. It took Stair Dismount to take me away from AB! Now I'm addicted to it!

Working Mommy August 26, 2011 at 10:43 PM   Reply to

The Man is addicted as well...well, he used to be addicted. Thankfully, he has made it through all of the possible levels and is now waiting for the new board to be released. I know he is giddy as a school girl on the inside.


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