Tuesday, January 31, 2012

My First Lego Video....How We Became

Everyone knows and has read and lived the same ol the story of how T and I met and then we had kids and now we live our crazy life one day at a time...blah blah blah.

Today I am going to tell you how we became us in a little bit of a different way.

Well I have been wanting to do something for a long time and I have finally taken that first step and dipped my toes into the cold waters of making a video. I have shot videos of the kids and stuff and just posted them as is but this is the first time I have ever MADE a video.

So if your ready for it is.

How We Became

Well short and sweet for the very first of what I hope becomes many in my adventures in Lego Movie Making. 

It wasn't easy.  First I had to hunt for and then hijack the kids Lego's.  When I wasn't finding what I was looking for I had to ask the kids and they didn't like the idea of me keeping their Lego's for any extended period of time.  C1 actually was upset yesterday because I still had his Lego Pirates hair.  It is still a work in progress but it was fun making a little Lego family and then taking the pic's and making the video.  I am excited to be making more soon.

Now I cant end this post without giving credit to the man that is behind all of this. John aka Daddys In Charge is the  Lego man. He has a great Daddy Blog and he makes the ABSOLUTE BEST Lego videos of his kids and includes himself and his wife. He even includes us other bloggers and even made one of me and the repo business.  Go check out his blog...I promise you will love it.  So I have to admit, I am trying to copy John and make kick ass videos like him, but it is all out of respect. 100%!  Thanks John for the influence and I hope to make a video that will make you say "Damn I taught him well"

Kiss the Baby



Monday, January 30, 2012

Moneyball.....More than a Movie. A lesson in Life.

Moneyball.  A true story.  Can it be more than just a story about baseball and a guy who sought to change the game? Well to me it was. When I rented this movie this weekend I wasn't sure what to expect. I knew it was a real story about sports and I love sports. The longer the movie went on, the more I got into the actual story of Billy Beane and what he was actually wanted to do and what he was about as a person.

Being the best of the best at one time when he was younger everyone believed in him. Everyone.  Once he started failing, people started to lose that belief in him. Everyone including himself.  That was the hardest part for him. He didn't believe in himself.  So he stopped doing what he once loved...playing the game of baseball.

Being in a different position later in life in the sport he loved, he had to regain that confidence. But the confidence he once had in himself, he now had to have that in the players that he signed to play for his team.  The players he would be signing to his team were players that were in the same spot he was in many years ago. Players with no confidence for some reason. Players that no one wanted.  Players that were told they had no shot.

The biggest thing that he learned and accepted was that if you really believed in something, no matter what it was you could do it. And it was the right thing.  He had one person that believed right along with him. Everyone else balked at what he was trying to do. They all laughed at him. Told him it wouldn't work.

This is what I got out of this movie.

What does it take to make it happen?  And by *IT*, I mean anything.  All it takes is the idea or dream you have and YOU.  Two things. That is all it takes to make it happen. Have you ever had something that you really believed in and people doubted you?  All you have to do is believe in yourself.  And if you believe in yourself, you might even find others that believe in you too.  Confidence is key.  It can either make your or break you.  You have it or you don't.  If you have it, it can be spread to others. People know if you are confident and can see it, feel it, feed off of it.  If you don't have any confidence then people can sense that too.  The greatest thing about what I'm trying to tell you is that this is true for both adults and children of all ages. 

Billy Beane believed in himself and what he was trying to do. That is why it was successful.

No matter what you are doing or trying to do, if you believe in yourself...

Then you can make it happen. 

Kiss the baby



Friday, January 27, 2012

The X Games. Just for the FUN of it.

This Daddy's Blog


If you are a sports fan, then there is no doubt that you notice things like I notice things. You may have your favorite sport and watch other sports or you may just be a general sports fan and kind of catch it all.  Me, I love football and basketball. Those have been my favorites for many years. But since having kids that do crazy things and being a lover of doing crazy things myself a new sport has stolen my heart within recent years.  It is actually more than a sport, it is a series of sports.....

The X Games. The Winter and The Summer X Games.

I noticed something last night as I was watching the games in bed with T.  In the heart of battle and fierce competition these guys all get along. They may not be friends (which most of them are friends), they may not be from the same country (they come from everywhere) but they all get along. They all cheer for each other.

Last night in the freestyle ski event, there was one guy who was smashing a record for points and I think the other competitors were just as excited for him as he was for himself.  They were all celebrating with him.

You never see any of these guys and girls hanging there heads. Throwing a snowboard or a skateboard across the way and getting mad. No, what you see are kids, guys and girls doing the stunts that they love to do, whether it be in their backyard or in the local streets.  They do it and they all have fun trying to outdo one another.

In a world where athletes are pushed to be the best they can be these athletes push themselves to be better than they were the previous stunt. They don't have the mega million dollar contracts that other sports stars do. They do get paid from endorsements and other signing deals from companies but nothing compared to the major sports.

If you are a sports fan, do me a favor. Check out ESPN this weekend and just watch a little bit of the Winter X Games and see if you can notice what I notice. See if you can see what I see.

The fun.

Have a great weekend

Kiss the Baby



Thursday, January 26, 2012

Would You Call The Police On Your Own Child?

Has there ever been a time when your child did something that you wanted to cover up and maybe even did cover up?  Have you ever protected your child from the punishment that he or she would receive for doing some kind of act that was unlawful?  Is there an age limit?  Does it depend on the act?

If you want to go to the radio shows page I listen to to read about what this dad did here is the link The Bert Show

A 30-year police veteran made a decision that anyone would make. He turned a kid into the police for beating another boy along with seven other teens in an alley and then posting the video to YouTube. What made the decision hard for this police veteran is that the boy that was seen on the video and then turned in was his own son.  That's right. His own son.

Friends and relatives saw the video and knew who the boy was. The only boy in the video without any kind of mask on. The father then was called and he watched the video for himself and as soon as he saw what had happened he called the police. He later said that if he had waited...he might not have.

His son was charged as an adult, was officially charged with felony aggravated battery and robbery charges, and his bail is set at $100,000.

WOW. Now I hope that T and I are doing a good enough job raising the C's that we will not ever have to even worry about this.  But what a hard decision that would be. Turn your kid in?  Shelter your child and protect him or her from the trouble?  Where do you draw the line. I know beating someone is different from stealing a piece of candy or a toy when the kids are young. It is a matter of just taking your child back into the store and letting the embarrassment factor be enough?  What about when they get older?  Does it come down to how a child was raised?  Maybe. Maybe not.

You would think that a child of a police officer might know better.  Was it the influence of other kids? Hanging with the wrong group?  So many factors could be involved. 

What would you do as a parent if your child was the one in that video?  Right now as of this moment, I am going to say that I would turn my child in as well. I will protect my children from things in this life probably for as long as I can. I am their father and that is what I do.  They learn. But they don't learn anything valuable from committing any kind of crime and then getting away with it. Lessons are hard and sometimes the best and most valuable lessons are the hardest ones.  Just like the police officer father, if given the extra time, I too may back out of calling the police.

What would you do?

Kiss The baby


Wednesday, January 25, 2012

My letter to the Captain of the Costa Concordia - Francesco Scheltino

Dear Captain Francesco Scheltino,

     Due to the recent events in which you decided to let your ship the Costa Concordia hit a rock which tore a 160 ft. hole in the side of the ship you have pretty much ruined any chance for me to take a cruise on the Disney Dream.

You being the Captain made a poor choice that has made it pretty clear that neither my wife or myself feel safe at all going on a cruise ship with our children.  I don't know what in the hell you were thinking as you let that massive ship hit that rock but you have got to be the biggest dumb ass in the history of the cruises.  I'm sure you had to have taken some kind of class to drive that big ass ship and navigate it through the sea's, I only wish that the school you went to wasn't taught by SpongeBob SquarePants.  In recent weeks I have come to find out that the Octonauts could have done a better job with that large boat. 

So with YOUR ship looking like this now

I can pretty much guarantee you that I wont be stepping on board a cruise liner in the near future.  I heard reports and statistics that the percentages are very low of these things happening but you and your awesome nautical skills that you learned from watching Gilligan's Island have made it more public the dangers of being on a cruise ship.

I also want to thank you for being the courageous man and staying with YOUR ship. You did exactly what a Great Captain should do in a time of distress and danger. Oh shit, wait. Wrong Captain. You are the one that says you accidentally tripped in a lifeboat and made it to shore and since it was dark you couldn't return to help the others that you left behind.  So while you may be rotting in a jail cell for a short period of time, the time it will take for me and my wife to feel comfortable enough to take our kids on the Disney Dream will be much longer. So to end this all I have to say is Great Job, Jagoff and thanks a lot for screwing up the one chance I had to take a cruise.

I will feel much safer being on this boat as a result of your error.

Sincerely and forever not your fan,

Scott aka This Daddy.

Kiss the Baby



Tuesday, January 24, 2012

The Bachelor...A guys take on Ben and a few of the Women

Monday was a great day.

I felt good.

Got to go home and have some good snuggle time with T as we watched The Bachelor with Ben. T and I were not going to watch this season after boycotting last seasons The Bachelorette with Ashley H, since she was hideous and annoying. But we decided to get back into it and Ben actually isn't that bad. Not the best looking dude, but he's mature, got a great business going, seems down to Earth and that makes him more appealing. He seems like he would be easy to get along with for the ladies.  T and I are also liking the same people this season which usually doesn't happen. But we both like a couple of the girls and there is one that we cant stand and I don't think anyone except this girls mother likes her.

First lets start off with our main man

Sac up brother and grow a pair. Stop worrying about the girls being mad at each other. You should have kept Shawntel but you were scared the girls wouldn't want to date you. Get real man. And oh, please get some longer swim shorts, below your knees.

Now above we have Monica. She was sent home last night. She cried. They all do. But I am going to miss her because she was the only one that would have stood up the Bitch of the Season.

Speaking of Bitch of the Season, here she is Courtney. Does anyone like her?  She isn't even pretty, and how is she a model? Rude attitude and runs her mouth. I hate to sound like a woman but she doesn't love Ben, she is just wanting her time to shine.

Poor Emily. I kinda like her. She seems to be OK. Her problem is that she rattles to easily.  She is trying to throw Courtney under the bus and then when she does and Courtney finds out and calls Emily out on it, she cracks under pressure. Don't let that girl get the best of you. And she does this weird thing with her nose and mouth. Bugs me a little.

 One of my favorites is Kacie B. The sweet soft spoken darling with the Charlies Angels wavy hair. I really would love fore her to be in the Final Two. She is really falling for Ben. But my problem with Kacie is that she is starting to get way too emotional. Kind of like Ashley H. was before. The crying and moaning about Ben on other dates and stuff. She is a sweet southern belle and I think her and Ben make a great couple.

Now, here is my NEW favorite. Jennifer became my favorite last night. I think out of all the girls she is the most mature and she is good looking too. Ben calls her the best kisser. I like how she is open and talks to him with ease.  I was telling T last night that its hard to find a redhead that is very attractive, but she is one. I don't see her being he emotional wreck that some of the others are being already.  I am pulling for her to be the chosen one. 

I'm not going to bother listing the other women.  He still have a few girls on there who are what I call the "Who are You Again Girls" ... This is a three girl race as far as I'm concerned. Cut bait, get down to it and pick your girl Ben, as long as it isn't Courtney.

Kiss the baby



Monday, January 23, 2012

Its my own pity party. And I'll cry if I want to.

Rough day at my house yesterday.

I thought I was going to have a good day. Started out with a little pain in the kidney and then it passed but as the day went on, well it hit me. The bad pain came from no where and it put me back on my knees pretty much bringing me to some more tears and all I could do was take a pain pill, sit there and wait to try and feel better. They say I'm going to have some kidney spasms from the surgery and stent removal but this is getting to me.  I'm not myself. I'm just not. 

I'm used to helping around the house. I'm used to being active and playing with the kids outside. I'm used to doing more than sitting in the damn chair. Laying in the bed. Crying and rolling around the floor. Taking pills every few hours. This shit is getting to me and its bringing me down. I'm trying to be positive and stay upbeat but I am having a hard time.

To be honest, I really feel like I am worthless to my family at times here the past few weeks.  Feeling good and telling the kids we are going to do something and then falling to the floor in pain from my damn kidney hurting from the spasms or leftover stones or something.  Trying to do my good husband deeds around the house and not really having energy to do anything.

I know this is my own damn pity party and T told me to not feel like this, but its hard. Its hard waking up starting my day good and then hours later feeling like shit.

That isn't me.  I'm a clown, I'm a joker, I'm a fifth kid, I'm the one that aggravates the kids. I'm the one that plays outside and rides bikes and runs and kicks the balls. The past few weeks I haven't been able to do that. I'm sad about that. I'm sad that T has to do everything and take care of me like I'm a newborn.

I guess the only funny thing about this weekend is that C3 wants to look at the strainer I'm pee'ing through to see if she can see some stones.  She is so excited and keeps asking me if I have pee'd the stones out.

Gotta love daughters.

Kiss The Baby



Friday, January 20, 2012

Getting Back To Normal

Man, what a wild two weeks it has been.

 From starting the previous week in pain and ending up in the hospital on Wednesday and surgery on Thursday then having a stent in me until this past Wednesday and then feeling like shit the past two days, it has just been a long two weeks.

Aside from the pain in my kidneys and the obvious pain from the stent, I dealt with the nasty feelings from being on all the medication.  I hate being in pain but I hate being on pills too.

If I was strong enough to get by the pain without the pills, trust me I would. If I even thought I could handle the pain, I would try. I'm struggling with the pills because of the past addiction I had to pills.  Pain pills to be exact.  Right now I'm taking the Antibiotic, the Vicodin, the pill that makes my pee not hurt?, I have another pain pill Toradol with anti-inflamatory, and they are making me better or worse?  I don't know. The Toradol makes me feel so out of it and I just fall asleep. The Vicodin makes me want to throw up.  The red pee pee easy pill, I don't know what it does.  The antibiotic I don't know either. 

How in the world did I ever just take this shit for fun? And still get shit done?  I have no clue.  I was younger but still, taking pills all day and even then drinking with them, I was such a dumbass.  No, I'm taking them and they are making me feel shitty when they are suppose to be helping me get through my painful time. Yeah right. I tried taking Advil yesterday and I was still in some pain. I tried eating with them and I still wanted to vomit everywhere.  I drank tons of water and still felt like I was going to fall asleep at my desk.

I am so ready to get past this shit and get back to myself. Being a doped up dad does not work for me. These pills that I took and ate like candy so many years ago are probably part of the problem.  I know how easy it is for people to get hooked, but I quit cold turkey too, so I know how easy it is for people to quit too.

I know that sometimes pain meds are needed, and I know that sometimes people use that as an excuse.

The one thing that I do know is that for the past two weeks of being on pain meds and getting shots could have easily been an open door for me to get hooked again. But what I know more than that, I have a great family support system and I see five reasons every morning and every night to not even think about doing something stupid like that. T and the 4 C's. 

So this weekend its about being back to normal. Being the husband and daddy that I normally am.

Kiss the baby



Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Sorry Honey

Last night and this morning I was very scared and stress out about having the stent taken out of me.  The stent going from my kidney to my man part and left there with a string hanging out was not the best feeling.  It was better than the pain I had last week before surgery but still not a great feeling.

I didn't know how bad it would be and I am a negative person when it comes to the doctors and stuff like that. All I knew is that the stent was up in me and the doctor was going to pull the string and get it out, and that sounded painful to me. Reason for my stress and tension and scared feelings. And the process of the stent removal lasted like 2 minutes and it was more of a burning feeling than a painful feeling. T was right, it wasn't that bad and now its over.

Well T who has been taking so good care of me over the last week and by that I mean she has done everything. Gotten my pills, made my meals, brought them to me, let me sleep, I mean did it all. Well last night and this morning I was an asshole to her.  She offered to make me breakfast and I was rude to her and a jerk.  I was stressed and scared but that's no reason to be like that to her and its worse cause she has taken such good care of me during the kidney stone surgery and recovery.

Honey, all I can say is I'm sorry for being a dick this morning and I cant wait till I get home and the kids are in bed tonight so we can have some cuddle time.

Kiss the baby



Monday, January 16, 2012

I know it was only Kidney Stones but I was thinking Death.

Wow this last week was a crazy week. And that probably understates its.

If you saw me and asked me Thursday just before noon, I would would have probably said "Yes, I am going to die" concerning my surgery. Thank God, no one asked me that. I was crying buckets around that time anyways.

From starting a Sunday thinking you have a stomach bug to laying in a hospital bed Wednesday night waiting for your Thursday surgery so many things can run in a head. And so many things did run marathons in my head.

The two things that hit me the hardest were,  I'm so lucky to have T here with me this visit to the ER and for my surgery. And then, T is not with the kids. I was so worried about the kids.

Was I going to die? Shit, I was thinking it. I'm not the most positive person and being in that position doesn't help any.

Money was a factor. Not having any insurance makes it hard to sit in a hospital and wonder if you are going to be OK and how much all of this is going to cost.

The actual surgery was bothering me. Knowing that things were going in and out of MY things didn't make me feel that great and knowing that a stent would be up inside of me until Wednesday makes me nervous too.

I know that I cried so much in my trip to the hospital. I am so glad that T was there with me. I was having breakdown after breakdown.  I don't know what was harder for me, wishing that T was with me the whole time and the kids being without her, or being there alone at night by myself.  I am a selfish person by nature and I wanted her there, but I wanted her to be with the kids too. It was hard. But, it worked out and she was with me until they took me back and then all I can remember was waking up in recovery ready to get to my room and feeling like I had to pee.

I had no contacts in my eyes and no wedding band on my finger but when I was being wheeled back to my room all I could see as I got closer and closer was the beautiful face of my T. She was there waiting for me and that was the best thing in the world.

I was so ready to get out of there and go see the kids and get home. I drank water like it was the last drops on Earth. "You have to pee before you can leave"...those are the words that you hear when you get back to your room. So the race was on to pee. Pee'ing and eating and the wires coming out of my PO-DO tool were the only thing on my mind.

Seeing the kids was so awesome. Hard getting them not to attack me, but I loved the hugs. That was so great to see the C's. I missed them. Hard to imagine how you can miss your kids for two days until you actually miss them for two days.

Friday, Saturday and Sunday while the days seemed to go by slow since I was doing nothing, they actually went by fast. I was taken care of by the best wife in the world. She did everything for me this weekend. She did so much that last night as it was time for bed and she was falling asleep, I was nervous because I didn't know if I had done or taken everything I needed to.

So sad but true how sometimes we don't realize exactly how much our wives do for us.

Kiss the baby



Monday, January 9, 2012

From Worse to Worse

The weekend started out so great.

T and I watched The Hangover II and I liked it and laughed my ass off and she didn't really care too much for it.

Saturday we got up early and headed to Discover Mills Mall. Its about 1.5 hours away but it had The Lego Outlet and the kids were so excited and C1 was even saying it was a "Dream Come True." C2 was also so excited that when I mentioned to him lets do something else he told me "You can just stay home daddy!"

So we got there and the excitement began.

The kids were in heaven in this store. It was brain numbing. I loved it in there too. And this Lego Outlet was not even close to the size of the Lego Store at Disney but the kids love legos and they all got to spend their own money and get what they wanted. They did good, they didn't even spend all of their money so they were happy. I even used my foursquare app and got a free lego block.

After that T went into the Crocs store and got some good deal on a few pairs of crocs for C1. Then as she hit the Disney Store, the kids and I rode the train that took you all around the mall. That was fun for the kids, me stuffing my fat ass in the train was not so fun.

So that was a nice time and I'm sure we will go again to that mall.

Saturday night we watched Mr. Poppers Penguin with the kids and they laughed so much. They liked that movie. It was cute.

Yesterday was a different story. Woke up early to go get an oil change for T and I couldn't even make it to our exit. I had the worst cramping pains and turned around and got back to my bed. The pain was so bad and was hitting me in my side and stomach area. Hurting so bad, so I'm thinking I have a kidney stone again. All I can do is drink water and flood my body and try to pass it. I couldn't sit still or lay down for too long without it hurting again. Kidney Stones are the worst pain in the world for a man. So all I can do now is sit here at work, drink my water and hope this thing goes away as the pain comes and goes from my sides to my stomach. Fun times and to top all that shit off, the Falcons lost yesterday. I couldn't even cry over the game, I was too busy crying over the stone in my body.




Friday, January 6, 2012

Fridays Final Thoughts 1-6-2012....Getting a Taste of My Own Medicine

I got a taste of my own medicine this week and it didn't taste very good.

Since I have been going to the gym on a regular schedule for a year now I have been getting up at 5am and getting to the gym around 5:30am and working out till 7am.  Well, before I started going to the gym, I was staying up to 1am or so and T would stay up and we would watch shows and talk.

Well my bedtime routine went from 1am to 12am to sometimes 11pm. And since the kids are homeschooling and I don't get home until 9pm, we let them stay up later so I can have some time with them and when they go to bed, that is when T and I have our time. Well after getting my stuff ready and getting coffee ready and taking my stuff to the car for the next morning, that usually gives us some time to talk and watch shows or tweet or whatever. But getting up so early, that means I am dead tired and fall asleep on her and leave her there. 

I have no idea of what she does. She could be dancing naked around me and I wouldn't know.

Well two nights this week. Count em TWO nights she has been so tired that as soon as the kids went to bed...she was out. The usual whispering request of "rub my head" came and as soon as I started rubbing her head she was sleeping sound. She was tired. I get it. I know she has crazy days and they are long just like mine.

Those two nights where she crashed out on me sucked.  The two nights that I stayed up and wasn't tired were the two nights she crashed out early. Let me tell you, I was so bored out of my mind. No one to talk to, no good games or anything on tv, I am not a reader, no online gaming, not PO-DO'ing myself, I mean I was just flat out bored. It hit me, this might be how she feels when I crash on her. It really did suck. So last night we watched Greys Anatomy together and talked some and then we went to sleep together. Lights out, kiss kiss, a little footsie action and we both were out at the same time.

So she taught me a lesson and she may not have done it on purpose but it worked.  Stay up at all costs until she is sleeping and then its OK to crash out.

Love ya honey.

kiss the baby



Thursday, January 5, 2012

R-E-S-P-E-C-T....Your kids and Your Spouse

Have you ever given a thought as to how you treat others compared to how you treat your own kids or spouse? You will probably say you do all the time and you are probably saying that you would never treat a stranger nicer than your own kids or spouse, but it you think about it or pay attention to detail, you might realize that you are actually being nicer to complete strangers than you are your own children and spouse.

Say you are at the store, mall, amusement park..etc. A place where there are lots of people around. What are some common words you may use when in the company of strangers?  Excuse Me, Pardon Me, Thank You, Sorry, and there are many more.  For this I am going to use the example of Excuse Me.

You are at the grocery store and you are looking for an item on the shelf and a person is standing in the line of sight for what you are looking for. Most people say Excuse Me. If you are that person in the way of sight another person might say to you Excuse Me.  It happens all the time. A polite thing to do.  Well now throw your kids in the mix. You are looking for that item at Publix and your son is in the way of sight and instead of saying Excuse Me, you say Move, Watch Out, Get over here so I can see.  Who were you nicer to?  The stranger.

Now I'm not telling you to be rude to the stranger and tell them to move it and get out of the way or anything like that.  All I'm saying is use the same key words you use with strangers, with your kids. I am guilty of this myself. I try to catch myself but sometimes it just doesn't happen.  What about you?  Do you do this?  Do you care?  Your kids might care, they might notice how you talk to nicely to others but don't to them.  Just something to think about.

This next example is something that I do way way to often. Its hard for me not to. But that is just an excuse.  You and your spouse (wife in my case) are anywhere. Car, store.. and you cant keep your hands off her.  Smack her ass when no one is looking, cop a feel of a boob, bump up behind her...Trust me there is a lot.  I may think its cute and funny, but I'm sure my wife doesn't.  Does your spouse think its cute and funny?  How do you know no one saw you?  You don't.  Now, would  you do that to a stranger?  Aside from it being a form of sexual harassment or assault, I mean would do that to another man or woman?  Would you walk up to a complete stranger and tell them you want to "DO THEM?"  I don't think so.

I'm not asking you to make it a assignment or project to go out and try this. Please don't.  What I am saying is that (myself included) give your spouse the same respect that you are going to give that stranger. Don't be all grab ass with your wife in public. Ladies even though we would love it if you grabbed our tree trunk junk in the store, it would be embarrassing for both of us.  Also at home, do you want your kids seeing you two dry hump each other? There is a difference between affection and dry humping each other.

I am going to make an attempt to make sure I treat my kids with the same respect ALL THE TIME that I treat strangers with. Not just here and there. My kids know I can be nice, they need to know that I am nice to them too.  I am also going to try and be more respectful to my wife. I think she deserves to be treated better. She knows I love her. She knows I think she is hot and sexy and that I love her ass, but that doesn't mean i have to grab and rub up on her all the time and say nasty things to her.

All I am asking you is to pay attention and see if you notice that you do this.

Kiss the baby



Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Crying It Out (CIO) Sucks. Plain and Simple

When we as adults go to bed at night we like for that to be a time of peace and calm. We all do different things to set the tone so we can get a good nights sleep. We may watch tv, read a book, listen to the radio but how many of us adults like to go to bed crying? I think if you said you like to go to bed crying, you are lying to yourself.  Really, going to bed crying and trying to fall asleep while crying. That means any number of things can be going on with you. Spouse hurt your feelings, you are in pain, or just had a very long stressful day. So how would crying yourself to sleep make any of that better?

It doesn't. At least I don't believe so.  So if it doesn't do us adults any good to cry ourselves to sleep, why would we make our kids Cry It Out? (CIO)  CIO refers to what some use as training for letting young babies or children fall to sleep at night. I don't agree with this at all. Not even one bit of me thinks that letting your child CIO is good for them. Don't children deserve to go to sleep the same way we do? In a peaceful way so they can actually have a good sound nights sleep.  All parents know that some kids are going to put up a fight at bedtime. So what does that mean? You work on it.  Maybe co-sleeping is for you, like it is and has been for us. Maybe not.  Maybe resting with your child until they fall asleep is your way. Maybe letting them fall asleep in your bed and then moving them is the way you do it. But if you are leaving your child who is screaming and crying at night when its bedtime then you are doing your child more harm than good in my opinion.

Why do children cry?  So many reasons, so many. Tired of course. Hungry. Hurt. Needing something. Scared.  There are too many to list.  Your child would need you for any of these during the daytime and you would be there for them during the day, so why would you leave your child at night.  Children need to know the parents are there.  Safety, security, the love we parents give to our children is something special. When you put them in a room and let them CIO you are leaving them. Do you think your child will want to go to bed every night if you leave them there to CIO? I don't think so, they are going to remember that when it was time for bed mommy and daddy left me and all I did was cry.  What good is that doing?

Look at the simple things. Your baby or child is CIO. You are in the other room and all you hear is crying. What can you do to stop that crying. Shut their door. Shut your own door. Get frustrated and go back and tell your child to go to sleep.  Yeah all of these make so much sense..If you're a moron. (In MY opinion)  If your child is upset for whatever reason, don't you want to hold them and let them know it will be ok.  Give that protection and make them feel secure? Or are you scared that your child will think that you will always be there to save them. That's crazy. You are not hovering over your child and doing them a disservice if you cuddle and sleep and gentle parents your babies and children.  We are talking about letting them go to sleep with peace of mind, just like any adult wants to do. We have held our babies for hours until they fell asleep. I can remember C1 crying forever when we got him home. We didn't leave him in a crib or our bed to cry, we carried him and walked laps around the house.  C3 also cried until I probably cried myself, but she was made to feel safe and that is what parents are for.

We co-sleep. Have and still do. C4 will be three in June and he can sleep with us until he goes to his bed.  Some of our children moved themselves and some we moved.  But we would stay with them and gradually move out the door until they were comfortable falling asleep on their own. Now we have three children that love their own beds and sleep in them.

This CIO thing just makes me so mad. Husbands and Fathers, if your spouse is crying for whatever reason don't you try to calm them and make them feel secure?  So why not do this with your child. Same for you Moms and Wives. Do you try to calm your spouse when he is so pissed and angry? Why would you do it for him but not your baby boy or girl?

Look different people do different things obviously, but do you really want your child going to sleep with the last thought in their head being that I was crying when I went to sleep?  Try something else if you are a CIO parent. You may be surprised. Your children may love you more for it later in life.

Kiss The Baby



Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Need to Feed....Breastfeed that is.

With the start of a New Year, so many things will happen this year that will affect us as parents of young children. One of them will be breastfeeding in public.  This is a problem and it seems to be a problem for everyone. Its a problem for mothers that have the right to breastfeed their child in public and its a problem for those who seem to think that those mothers should go do it in private.

Many years ago before I was married, I'm sure women breastfed and I'm sure they did it in public. I never noticed and I doubt I would have cared. I had plenty of friends that had babies and I cant remember if they breastfed or not but to think I might have made a crazy comment or to think I may have been grossed out by it, just doesn't seem like me.

Earlier in 2011 here in Georgia, we had the whole Forest Park Breastfeeding ordeal. Mothers won that day and gained back the right to breastfeed in public in that city.  Then a Dancing With the Stars dancer Lacey Schwimmer made comments about how a mother should go elsewhere to breastfeed her child other than in public.  Target made the news by asking a woman to go somewhere else in the store to feed her baby.  Then most recent Nascar driver Kasey Kahne made news by his rude comments on twitter and then firing back at a breastfeeding woman by calling her names. 

Now of course all these public places and people apologize and send out letters of being sorry and have mass PR moves that try to win fans and customers back. But is it enough? I don't think so. And I don't even know what can be done to correct the problem.

Me being on the side of Pro Breastfeeding in Public, thinks that more women and men need to support moms that do this. Its not a crime. Its not nasty, women who breastfeed show less cleavage than the average woman does on any given day. Normally sitting and trying to be in a calm area so the baby can eat without being distracted or interrupted.

Women will get looks. AND?  Young boys look at boobs. They will learn later in life its not about that. Girls look. They will also learn that what they are looking at is a great thing. People that say they are grossed out need to do some research and learn a little bit. Do I want to see a fat mans plumber crack? NO. I don't make a big deal about it. Do I want to see nasty looking women wearing Dora the Explorer shirts? NO. But I say nothing.  How about the most common said thing to a breastfeeding woman. "Cant you go in the bathroom?"....I wouldn't even eat in my own bathroom let alone a public restroom.

Dads and Husbands, show support to your wife and other women that breastfeed in public. Show more support to your wife of course. Women make sure you are there for your co breastfeeding moms. You never know if they are having a hard time or getting backlash.

Maybe something will change. Maybe this is the year people use their complaints for something that actually needs to be complained about.

Kiss The Baby


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