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Monday, February 27, 2012

How do you choose your childrens bedtime?

Not every household is the same. Not all parents are the same. Not every child is the same.

For instance, I work long hours.  I have an hour drive each way. 
Since we homeschool, it allows our kids to stay up later so I can get some time with them.  We usually have the kids in bed before 11pm but C1 and C3 are night owls. C2 no matter what will be out by 10:30pm even if he had a late nap, he will be out at that time for sure.  C4, well he changes his sleep pattern sometimes. But it's nice to have the kids up late. If they went to bed earlier times like a lot of the standing school kids did, then I would hardly ever see them.

I know some parents work crazy hours like me and still don't get to see their kids.  Some parents who work weird job schedules and have the kids going to sleep early amaze me.  I know work those schedules because they have to, but I couldn't do it. Work those hours and not see the kids when I got home.  Yeah its crazy, loud, and the kids wear me out in just a few hours but that is my kids time and I have no other time with them during the week.

One local radio personality last week tweeting about her two year old being ready for bed at 7pm and that is when I had to ask her if it was from her crazy early radio station schedule or her babies age, and for her it was the babies age.  Time staggered from parents I talk to on twitter.  Some from having to be ready for a daycare or a bus stop.  Some who just wake up early like 6am so they go to bed early.  I did talk to one parent in twitter who said even though her husband works full time and has a music career too, he works some long hours and the kids still go to bed early. I couldn't do that, it would drive me to tears. I couldn't imagine working that long and hard and even loving what I do, yet be away from the kids that much.

I already miss breakfast and dinner with the family and I am really jealous of those that get to eat with their kids. I know that the breakfast-dinner table can be crazy at times, but I love those times.  I sit here and think about the funny conversations and looks and just miss it.

It makes me think if parents missing out on certain children's activities and time with the kids is a reason that some of them homeschool.  Giving those parents and kids more time together when one of the parents might work extended hours.

What is the reason behind your child's bedtime?


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10 comments:

Brad Jenkins February 27, 2012 at 11:40 AM   Reply to

We struggled so much with the girls' sleep pattern we actually had to consult a sleep expert. Long story short, they started going to bed at 7 PM and now sleep until at least 8 AM.

For us, that schedule trumps everything else. If we disrupt it, things do not go well. I adjusted my work schedule years ago to be able to spend time at home, even pre-kids. I do not violate it. My co-workers and clients know that I will be in early and leave at 4:30, pretty much no matter what. That means I get to feed them dinner every single night, which I love doing.

If things change down the road I will make the necessary adjustments to my schedule if possible so that I can spend time with them every day. I know people that don't see their children through the week, but I couldn't handle that. If I do have to travel and am gone a few days, I make sure to take a few days off to play catch up, and give Mama a break.

B Sides February 27, 2012 at 12:53 PM   Reply to

We have triplets and their sched is a combo of our planning and when they are tired out and ready for sleep. IOW if they tire early off to bed, if its later and hit our "ceiling" off to bed.

This Daddy February 27, 2012 at 1:34 PM   Reply to

Brad, I would love to get off at 4:30. I wouldnt care what time I had to go in. That is awesome you make it work for you like that.

This Daddy February 27, 2012 at 1:35 PM   Reply to

B Sides, TRIPLETS...I think they would have to wake me up to do anything. Trips, that is a major fast pace life right there

B Sides February 27, 2012 at 2:19 PM   Reply to

The guy with 4 calls me busy...

plantingpennies February 27, 2012 at 7:12 PM   Reply to

We try to have our boy in bed before 9:00, with or without his nap. Sometimes we have to stay up late when we are with other families, or on a train/bus going home. So he gets to stay up late if its for good family reasons.

We moved b/c our schedules didn't allow for the kind of family time we wanted, now we have it.

Blessings to you and the fam,
Never surrender,
ML

Doug February 27, 2012 at 7:51 PM   Reply to

Scott ... with as many as we have, bed time is not one single time.

Because they get cranky: elementary school age kids start headed for bed around 8:30 and are typically in bed between 9 and 9:30.

Because they are homeschooled / older, the middle-schoolers and high-schoolers get an extra hour to stay up.

The three over 18 are in charge of their own schedules. If they're up to go to work / school / help at home ... that's good enough, and I don't need more.

And: like anything else, it's up to interpretation, subject to change, and YMMV ;-)

Chrissy February 28, 2012 at 9:54 AM   Reply to

I think it's crazy that a child would be up til 11:00, but that's just my opinionated self blurting something out! ;) The one thing on your side is that you homeschool. I have a friend who does this with her kids because of her schedule (they are up late like your kids), but one day her kids will have to completely readjust when they begin public school. I can't imagine that...having this sleeping pattern and then trying to re-teach them when to go to bed and when to get up.

For us, kids are in bed by 8:30pm and up by 6:30am (or sometimes 7:00am).

Kathy February 29, 2012 at 8:14 PM   Reply to

We try to get our kids in bed by 8pm during the week, no later then 9. 2 of them are in school so if they go to bed any later then 8 they are a pain when they wake up. The baby (carly) has to be in bed no later then 8 or she is crankier then shit. All the kids are usually up by 7- 7:30am.

My Uncle works late nights to so my aunt allows my cousin to stay up late until his daddy gets home.

Momma Chantal March 1, 2012 at 6:42 PM   Reply to

Wow, that is later then I stay up! Our kiddos are in bed by 6:30 and up around 8:30. Granted they are 3 years old. My husband gets about 90 minutes with them each night between some play time, dinner, bath and bed time routine. He pretty much takes over the kiddo time when he walks in. We enjoy the earlier bed time as well because it means we also have adult and marriage time. We prioritize our marriage and our time together as much as we do the time with our children. When do you have your adult time if the kids are up so late?

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