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Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Twenty Plus Things That Dads Should Tell Their Daughters - Featuring Carl Hemp

Carl is a kick ass dude.  He can often be heard on the mean streets of Atlanta road raging fools while sitting in traffic.  He can be found at Home Depot buying home repair kits after his dog finishes a project.   I like to talk to Carl on twitter.  We reminisce about the days of old when we wore Puma Sweatsuits and shoes with fat laces.  Carl is one of the Producers on my favorite morning radio show The Bert Show.  I love when he gets air time because like myself he is a father.  Not to mention we are both hip, strong, good looking, well spoken men.  Shit, I'm lying.  I'm not hip, I'm sort of strong, barely pass the ugly test and half the time I don't have a clue of what I'm saying....

But we are both fathers,  he has two daughters a 11 year old and a 6 year old. And I have C3 who is 6 years old. We both know that daughters are different from sons.  Daughters have to be told to do things differently than sons in some cases.   So Carl came out with a list ......

The 22 Things That Every Dad Should Tell Their Daughters List (Link)

So what I wanted to do is go over his list and make some comments of how they apply to me and C3.  Now not all of them will apply to every dad and every daughter.  Some dads like to have a special relationships with their daughter, like that crazy Hulk / Brooke Hogan thing.  And by special I mean rocks in the head with no cushion.  For those of us like Carl and myself, we believe that we want our daughters to grow up to be able to take care of themselves if they have to.  We also want our daughters to know that they are awesome in every way. 

Here is Carl's list. (IN BOLD) My comments follow.  My comments are what popped out of my seldom used brain when I read the list. 

1. Pretty is as pretty does.  C3 is a pretty girl but damn that girl can be rough. So she might be Rough is as Rough Does as well.  But Pretty Girls kick ass too. Remember that.

2. When someone shows you who they are, believe them the very first time.  Always trust someone until they give you a reason not to. Just like you want us to believe you when you tell us something.
3. Don’t blend in; blend out.  She will do this for sure.  She will be like T in that regards. Don't be the same.  Be You!!! She already stands out.  I love this about her.

4. Watch how a man treats his mother, most likely he’ll treat you the same.  And watch how I treat your mommy and you better not settle for anything less than that.

5. When God made you he didn’t make any mistakes. You’re beautiful just the way you are.  True. True.  That's why I have Bruno Mars "Just The Way You Are" on her playlist.

6. Be your biggest cheerleader!  If she is anything like me (and she is) she will talk shit about herself and make sure EVERYONE knows how awesome she is.

7. Know how to make a fist, and throw a punch.  Oh man. She knows how to do this.  Having 2 older brothers and a younger brother. C3 can hold her own.  Just ask all the boys she has pushed down on the soccer field.  And it scares me sometimes.

8. Fairy tales come true only if you go get it.  C3 will not be one that waits for things to fall in her lap.  She already at age 6 is a go getter.  A World Changer.  She will be known in the future.

9. Bad boys are fun, but ain’t no changing them.  Depends on what kind of Bad Boy. I was a Bad Boy but only in the way of drugs and alcohol.  T changed me.  It can be done.  But don't waste your time on a lost cause.

10. Don’t hesitate to knee a dude in the sack if he comes into your comfort zone and you feel threatened.  Even if you don't feel threatened do this. Why in the hell is a boy in your comfort zone.  Throw elbows, kick, punch, headbutt....wait don't headbutt, may mess up your nose. 

11. Love yourself even more than he does.  We have a long way to go before we have to talk about this one.

12. The internet can harm you just as much as it can help you.  And that goes for Poptropica, the Ipad, your DS.  Books. Books cant harm you. Don't worry about who Brett Farve is either.

13. Learn how to change a tire and jump a car.  I have to learn how to do this too. Hey, Daddy-Daughter Date Night.

14. Never seriously date a man you couldn’t marry.  I'm not even thinking about this yet.  I don't even want to think about her talking to boys. Boys are yucky!

15. Some days you’ll feel like life sucks, know that the things will always get better with time.  So instead of pouting, do what we ask and move on. This will pass.

16. Ladies only fight to protect themselves.  Yes, so when your brothers come at you, protect yourself.  Handle business. But be easy on them OK.

17. A man will sail to the end of the earth to get to you if he really wants you.  Or he will at least give you his best Lego Mini Figure.

18. Don’t ever hit a man and not expect to get hit back.  Just don't hit anyone. I don't want to hurt someone for putting hands on you, or explain to a parent how you knocked their child out.

19. You can be pretty, but being intelligent makes you prettier.  And have a good attitude. Don't be a little mean thing.  Don't roll your eyes and say "Whateva".

20. Your body is your temple.  Mommy will tell you.  Take care of yourself.  Brush your teeth. Floss. Hair, nails, eat right and use the soap for crying out loud when you take a bath, don't wipe your nose on your shirt.

21. You don’t have to do anything for anyone to love you, just be yourself.  And as long as you love you and we love you everything will be alright.  Never do something to try and make people like you.  If people don't like you for you.....Screw em!

22. You can do anything a man does.  And better.  You can be smarter than a boy.  You are killing it on the soccer field already, you are faster than your brothers, you do CrossFit with me and they don't!!!  You can totally do anything a boy can do.   And my own little one to add.   23. Never clean up pee after your brothers. Ok. So this is daddys fault. I obviously have not done the best job at teaching the boys how to pee.  Take charge.  Get their nasty pee pee all over the place selves in the bathroom and make them clean it up.   So girls, ladies, boys and future wanna be playa's of America......Keep your head on a swivel and out of the clouds because you will never know when the Hemp Girls and C3 will be running the show and by the time you do notice.....   .........It will be too late.   Carl Hemp:  Producer 4 The BertShow on Q100 ATL, Fatherhood Advocate & Speaker, Passionate Mentor & Student of LiFe. 4 bookings contact DonSchumacherEntertainment@gmail.com



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