Monday, December 23, 2013

Christmas Wake Up Call

I am going to stay on my CrossFit schedule for Christmas.  I am going to just plan on getting up around the same time on Christmas morning that I usually get up for my workouts.


I expect the kids to pull no punches AGAIN this year.  I see the the kids getting up early, making a shit ton of noise and then making damn sure that we are up and entering the World of Mass Present Destruction way earlier than we should.  I will make sure that the timer of the coffee pot is set to EARLY AS F**K and that the pot is full.  Will I even get a chance to pee before being rushed off to the living room?  Better make sure the battery on the camera is charged since lots of blurry photos will be taken! 

Yes, Yes, I will have on underwear.  I will be wearing more than a wife beater as I watch the kids rip open boxes so fast that pieces go flying everywhere.  How many screams of "That's Mine" or "Lenox Get Off" will be heard before the sun comes up?  In the middle of all the craziness one kid will blurt out "When Is Breakfast?" and then another kid will holler "I Don't Want That!"  

It wont be snowing, it wont be raining (maybe) and maybe just maybe the sun will come out.  The will be a great chance and some tears being shed over present overload.  Kids may fight.  Yeah, I'm pretty sure the kids will fight.  Things will be lost.  I'm sure that will happen.  But the forecast says there is 100% chance of fun.  

The 4 C's will be having so much fun and the place will look like a tornado hit and you know what?  I won't give a shit about the tornado and I won't care about the mess and I won't care about all the other craziness.  I'm going to enjoy it more than I ever have before.  I'm going to soak up the fun and let the kids be kids.  

I'm going to act a fool and act like a kid too.  And by 9am  will be ready for a nap.

Have a fun Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. 



Thursday, December 19, 2013

More Than A Three Tour

So C2 and I got through security and made it to our gate.  As we waited to board we talked, we laughed and then we waited a little more as our flight was delayed.

As we sat on the plane and we flew to San Antonio C2 played his gaming device and I listened to music and tried to avoid the overly large male ass that kept getting closer and closer to my face as the 6'6 male across the aisle from us liked to get up a lot.  Thank goodness he moved.

We landed.  We met my Mom and Dad (Nanny and PawPaw) and then we drove to the house.  First thing C2 did when we got to the house was look for the Elf on The Shelf (Freddy) and it didn't take him long.  We were both tired so he went to bed and then I did some paperwork with my parent for the new vehicle T and I were getting from them.

Woke up ready for an adventure of a 14-15 hour drive back to West Ga.  The Yukon Denali was already loaded and ready to go.  I know C2 was excited for the drive and the adventure.  He talked about it before we even got there and he was looking forward to making stops at the visitor centers along the way.

And we were off.

As were were about to get out of Texas....We encountered the City of Beaumont.  Now no one likes Beaumont unless you are from Beaumont (Still question you) or you are looking to leave Texas and you know this is the last place as you exit.  So we stopped at the State Visitor Center and C2 loved it. This kids hates pictures, really.  But he let me get a few of him. 

He even posed. Damn. Who is this kid that is letting me take his pictures. 

We then made it into Louisiana and boy do I hate that State.  We loved crossing over all the bridges and there are some big tall ones and long ones as we drove across the land.

Here is C2 at the Louisiana Visitor Center.  Didn't stay long.  Didn't want to get sick or anything.

We drove and drove and drove.

We got hungry.  And none of you will believe me but we wanted to eat Cracker Barrel and wouldn't you know it but we couldn't find one.  I tried to get off an exit for one but we missed it.  I figured that there would be one on any of the other hundred exits. NOPE.  You see them all the time, until you want one. 

We finally decided to stop and eat at the Olive Garden. Got us a grilled chicken salad and rested out butts and legs and stretched out for a bit while eating.

That was in Hammond, LA.  Then it was on for the last part of the trip.

C2 FINALLY decided to get some rest.  He laid back and went to sleep and got him a good dose of the shut eye.  Man, let me tell you..that is a long drive.  As I got closer, I told myself there is no way in hell I am stopping unless it is to sit somewhere and rest for a while.  I was not about to get a hotel and waste time being that close.  Once I got within 5 hours left, I was making it.

Then we got within 2 hours left and I was like...Gotta make it. Gotta make it.

Then it happened.  2:30am Sunday morning we made it into the driveway and we were home.  T opened the door for us, C2 went to bed, I climbed in bed and T said it didn't take long for me to start snoring.  The 14-15 hour trip lasted 17 full hours but that included all the stops.

We were happy to be home.  The rest of the C's were happy we were home.  The animals were happy we were home.

And T was happy this was now home

Thanks for the new ride Mom and Dad, T loves it and it has already been turned into a Reindeer.  

The kids are also happy to have a bigger more roomier ride.

That was a fun adventure with C2.  It started with a great flight and ended with a fun drive back to Ga.



Thursday, December 12, 2013


I have taken many road trips in my life.

They are journeys.  

They are fun.

You never know what you may encounter.

This time, I am taking a road trip with what could be called my "Mini Me".  Now we don't look anything alike, but we sure do have the same attitudes.  We share the same short triggered temper.  We both freak out a little too much over the smallest things.  

But we are both clowns, we both love to joke even when it goes to far, we both love the woman in the house and we are both early risers.

C2 and I are

Hitting the open road sometime in the near future.



Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Why do people care?

So she is the Worlds wealthiest Supermodel and she might be one of the sexiest women in the World.  But shit, she is breastfeeding while being pampered and made up and taken care of.  So many people have been crying and complaining about this. If you are one of those people that are bitching and moaning about Gisele doing what SHE does...Get a fucking life. Ok. Honestly. 

She is a mom.  Not all moms are the same.  We can all agree that moms do what they have to do when and if they are breastfeeding their child.  It just so happens that this mom is getting her hair, makeup and nails done by her team.  She posted a pic, and???  

People want to complain about shit. Jealous.  If you are complaining you are jealous. Face it.  Jealous of her breastfeeding, jealous of her looks, her body, the fact that someone else can do her nails instead of having to paint them yourself.  Shut the hell up.  

If she were bottle feeding would that matter?  If her kid was crawling on the floor would that matter?  If Tom Brady was there talking to her? I mean come on people. Complaining about shit that does not affect you is way to petty.  Complain about something that will benefit you, your family or make it better.  If she was doing this and her kids were with a Nanny, ya'll would cry about that. 

Look, my wife breastfed while doing many things.  If I was ever able and she wanted to, she would have breastfed any of the C's while having a team pamper her, maybe.  

*Disclaimer*  I never breastfed and I never attempted to breastfeed any of our children or any other children.  



Wednesday, December 4, 2013

This Is Not Your Beyonce's Halo

This was too funny.  Now normally T won't get aggravated over something silly on tv but yesterday she made a comment about a commercial she saw.  I had no idea what she was referring to until she showed me the actual commercial.

I laughed.  Now I didn't get all fired up like *cough cough* she did, but I did say that the child in the tv commercial was a little bit of an asshole.

So here is the one she was referring to

Damn this little girl from coming over with her little smart ass attitude and talking to her parents like this. Who bought the damn Halos in the first place.  So while the parents look all shocked and can't figure out what to say.....these responses came to mind

"We bought them, we will eat them all!"
"Watch this" *Throws Halos across the soccer field* 

I do have to say that the scene of the parents jumping through the sprinklers was funny.

Then I saw this one. 

Ok. Now while the dad playing in the tub with floaties and rubber duckies is something that I may or may not do, the man sweater has to Not the point I know, but I have to reference it.  I will stand in my kitchen and eat those Halos and if that kid appears out of no where and scares the shit out of me, I will go all Chuck Norris on his little ass.  After his 10 foot tall and bullet proof mouth finished I would have told him..

"Yes, it is ok for me to do that in the bath, WHILE I eat these f-ing Halos"
"Boy you scare me again like that and I will flush you down the toilet"

I also saw one that was too damn funny. 

This kid has his arms crossed like he is going to whoop his dads ass.  Like uncross those damn arms before I beat you with them. Boy...And yes. I broke that race car bed so what, you mom and I got busy in that bed crazy freaky like that is why it broke. BOOM.  

So why on Earth does the Halo company think that these commercials are even cute?  I mean, sure you laugh and you talk about the kids and how "Awwe, they are so cute"  Bullshit.  If your kid or kids really talked to you like that what are you going to do?  Are you going to look at them and walk off? No, you are going to do what you do!  Parent.  The only funny and cute part about the commercial spots are when they show the parents doing goofy shit.  Kids are already rude and disrespectful at times, why give them extra ammo. 

I really think the commercials are not doing them any good or really any harm.  They are just there.  Sure they got me to talk about them, but I am no one big, I just talk all kinds of shit about everything.  But what was really funny was that the commercial spot got T to do that thing with her eyebrow where it raises up.  Just the one brow.  The thing she does that makes you step back and choose your words carefully. 

Yeah that!  

*Disclaimer*  I do not endorse any mental or physical harm to your children or my own and comments made on this blog by me are just a bunch of trash talk.  We all know my kids rule me and probably would kick my ass if I touched the Halos. 

Kiss The Baby



Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Do You Disney?

I am a huge fan of Disney.  I love the movies.  I love the messages they try to deliver to the kids.  I love the Characters and how they stay with kids almost seems like forever.

As time goes on, I think some of us maybe lose kind of forget all of the great Disney movies that came out long ago. I know I have.

For instance, Cinderella and Snow White are two classic Disney movies.  I know how awesome they are and all the wonderful things that came from them.  But if you find me on an average, stop me in the street and ask me my favorite Disney movies I wouldn't name them.  They just wouldn't come to my mind that fast.  After taking the kids to see Frozen this weekend, I started thinking about the Disney movies that were my favorites.  I started wondering what movies made my Top 5 All Time Disney Kids Movies?

So I thought about it.

This is what I came up with. My Top 5 Disney Kids Movies

5.  Frozen -  This movies that just came out was cute from the start.  I love how it played the  sisterly love card and carried it on from there.  The movie was filled with song and dance.  Some parts made me think of what a Disney Grease would sound like.  You never knew what to expect with this movie.  Who was good, who was bad, who would save the day?  Many times I looked back and saw C1 and C2 laughing.  I looked over and saw C3 smiling.  C4, well he didn't move and inch or make a sound till the movie was just about over.  I'd say that's a good sign.  T and I kept looking at each other and laughing at the multiple funny moments in the movie.  Olaf the Snowman will be the favorite for the kids I'm sure.

4.  Cars - Just the first one.  A story about overcoming all the obstacles to get what is important only to find out that what was important was right in front of him.  Making a movie about all the different kinds of vehicles and the personalities was a great move.  The movie shows that winning isn't everything if you have to go above and beyond the rules.  Also had the truthfulness in the way that it showed how small towns have become less and less available as the bigger cities grow.  Also finding that true friendship.  Lightening McQueen pairs up with Mater and the two have adventures galore.

3.  Toy Story - I love this entire series but it can't get any better than the first time Woody and Buzz meet.  This is like the ultimate dream for a kid.  All the best toys and then when not around the Toys come alive!  I love how Disney picked all the toys to add from even when I was a kid.  And the way Andy loved his toys, that is hard to find now at times with a lot of children falling prey to the World of electronics.  And another classic example of how Disney makes the friendship of two characters the biggest story line.  Buzz and Woody saving each other from crazy boy Sid.

2.  Beauty and The Beast - This has always been one of my favorites if not my all time favorite.  This movie is so great.  Starts off with the musical aspect of it all and lead Belle to a place where she will soon discover what love it and during this time she will teach the Beast how to find love in his heart.  It's funny too how the jerk guy Gustav tries to bully Belle into loving him instead.  The staff of the Beast is also so much fun.  The singing makes this a fun movie and even though some of it may be a little dark for the younger kids, it spreads a good message of how true love wins.

1.  Wall - E - If you have seen this movie then you can guess why I love it.  It's nothing but a fun story about how a little robot that collects all the garbage and blocks it up to recycle it ends up saving Earth.  As every human leaves for space where they don't have to do anything for themselves, Earth is left with a pile of junk adding up.  Soon Eva is sent to collect data to see if life exists on the planet.  The spaceship that everyone lives on is taken over by sinister robots that don't want to go back to Earth and at that point Wall-E and Eva have to take action along with other friendly robots.  This movie teaches so much about friendship and gets deep regarding how to treat the place that we live.  How to care for the planet.  I loved using this movie as a early guide on how to make Earth a better place for the kids.

Well that is MY Top 5.  Like I said, I know there are so many Disney Kids Movies to choose from and I could probably interchange some like Monsters Inc, Nemo, Fantasia just to name a few.

What are your favorites?

Kiss The Baby


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